wild and wandering
W A N D E R L U S T.
A word that brands notebooks, teeshirts, and hipster photos round the globe.
Webster's definition: "A strong longing or impulse toward wandering."
When said, it conjures images of sun spots, music festivals, highways, and lots of Free People fringe. Just try to convince me you don't like it, just a little. It represents a person with insatiable hunger for seeing, adventuring. But the word 'lust' doesn't allow for long term satisfaction in the carnal sense, and I don't think it does in this case, either.
I'll admit it. I've been deep in the throes of it before. Just dying to GO for the sake of going. But each time I did leave home, I would return and just be so sad to be in the midst of everyday life again. Depressed it was over. For me, this mentality led to emptiness, not fulfillment. I had this crazy desire to adventure, but it wasn't enough to satisfy me... so why was it there?
I tried to push it down. I longed for contentment within my nine to five lifestyle. I had so many of the American Dream boxes checked off, wasn't that enough?
Well nope. It wasn't.
A few weeks ago, we had a speaker who is a part of a popular band. One of his songs cries out,
"Jesus I'm a wild one
They've tried to tame me but I don't want their life, no
Help me Jesus, I'm one of your wild ones."
The concept of being wild was spoken of a lot that week. For the first time, I realized that it wasn't a curse to be restless, to long for adventure. God makes a lot of people that way, with intention to use it for good.
Talk about freedom.
This revolutionized everything for me. Instead of being bashful about my longing for adventure, I saw that it was a beautiful thing, and that God wouldn't put that in me without intentions to use it. In a way it feels like a cure for wanderlust. Instead of haphazardly jumping on any train to anywhere, I now have a compass showing me where to go, and it's never pointing the wrong way.
This is not to say that each adventure has to have a visible outcome, sometimes God wants us to simply revel in His creation. There's so much of it.
I'm learning how to surrender that desire, and see what God wants to do with it. That in itself has already been an adventure!
So. Here's to finding freedom in getting lost in the right direction>>>